If you want to solve bigger problems, there’s a possibility of getting overwhelmed even before you start. The wise way to solve a problem is the deconstruct it into smaller pieces, and then work on the action plan starting from the smallest possible step.
If you have never worked on your emotions, it can get overwhelming even to start. Hence, you need to start with micro-level habits.
Before we move forward, I want to address a common misconception about emotions. When we can’t find a way to handle our emotions, we start seeing them as our enemies. It’s not uncommon for me to hear my clients say, “I wish I didn’t have any emotions.”
When we can’t find a way to handle our emotions, we start seeing them as our enemies.
Your emotions are not monsters. They are simply signals to your brain about your surroundings. If somebody slapped you in public, your brain would tell you that you’re feeling humiliated so that you would feel embarrassed or angry or even anxious.
Likewise, when your friend hugs you, your brain will tell you that you are loved, and it’s a good feeling, so you might blush or smile or feel happy.
That’s it. This is what emotions are. They aren’t monsters. And we need to understand them and learn how to work with them.
After working with hundreds of people in the last few months, I can assure you it’s not super hard to live an emotionally healthy life.
It’s a little inconvenient at the beginning (like all other beginnings), but by practicing the following 5 micro-habits, you can start living an emotionally healthy life.
Habit 1: Label your emotions
By default, we identify our emotions as ourselves. You must have observed yourself, saying, “I am angry,” “I am happy.”
But these are your emotions. You are not happy. You are feeling happy.
The first micro habit of becoming emotionally aware is to start labeling your emotions.
Instead of saying “I am happy” or “I am anxious,” start saying “I feel happy” or “I feel anxious.”
This will show you that you are not your emotions. And you can disconnect with them when required.
The first micro habit of becoming emotionally aware is to start labeling your emotions.
Habit 2: Regular check-in
A daily journaling habit can help you a lot. Here are some journaling prompts you can use.
- How am I feeling today?
- What is this making me feel?
- What is making me feel so happy/sad/anxious?
Keeping a regular check on your emotions will help you understand your emotions and your triggers in a better way.
If you are starting, maybe you would want to repeat this exercise multiple times every day.
So the next time you get anxious, you won’t try getting rid of your emotion; instead, you will look into the triggers and resolve them.
Keeping a regular check on your emotions will help you understand your emotions and your triggers in a better way.
Habit 3: Practicing forgiveness
It’s easier for us to fall into the pit of self-pity when we see how we have complicated so many simple things.
Forgiving yourself for your past ignorance is a significant step for your emotional well-being.
Otherwise, if you don’t forgive yourself, you would hold on to this feeling of guilt, shame, regret, and it won’t let you move on to a more peaceful state.
Your past ignorance was a defense mechanism from your brain and appreciating it will help you let go and move on.
Your past ignorance was a defense mechanism from your brain and appreciating it will help you let go and move on.
Habit 4: Practicing stillness and detachment
If we don’t practice stillness, our emotions can make us responsive to anything and everything. Even the smallest of the matters can take away our mental peace if we aren’t conscious about it.
Deliberately practicing stillness every day can increase our response time, and our emotions will not be as troubling then.
Practicing stillness will also make you realize that no emotion is permanent. Your happiness, sadness, and all the other emotions are temporary.
Detachment from your emotions will help you regulate your emotions in a better and more objective way.
Deliberately practicing stillness every day can increase our response time, and our emotions will not be as troubling then.
Habit 5: Working with a life coach
I wish I could afford coaching programs earlier. That’s what I realized I would have done if I had more resources.
Hiring a life coach has been one of the best decisions of my 2020. I saw tremendous personal growth, and it won’t be an understatement to say, I learned how to regulate my emotions in the most sustainable way.
Working with a life coach regularly can help you evolve emotionally as a human.
Here’s how I help my clients to live an emotionally healthy life.
Working with a life coach regularly can help you evolve emotionally as a human.
Summary
By practicing the following 5 micro-habits, you can start living an emotionally healthy life —
Habit 1: Label your emotions
Instead of saying “I am happy” or “I am anxious,” start saying “I feel happy” or “I feel anxious.” This will show you that you are not your emotions. And you can disconnect with them when required.
Habit 2: Regular check-in
Keeping a regular check on your emotions will help you understand your emotions and your triggers in a better way.
Habit 3: Practicing forgiveness
Your past ignorance was a defense mechanism from your brain, and appreciating and forgiving it will help you let go and move on.
Habit 4: Practicing stillness and detachment
Practicing stillness will also make you realize that no emotion is permanent. Your happiness, sadness, and all the other emotions are temporary. Detachment from your emotions will help you regulate your emotions in a better and more objective way.
Habit 5: Working with a life coach
Working with a life coach regularly can help you evolve emotionally as a human.
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