Stoicism has saved me over and over again.
And I feel like it comes natural to me.
Although, at times, I find myself in situations where I have to revise these lessons from all the stoic philosophers.
“A Stoic is someone who transforms fear into prudence, pain into transformation, mistakes into initiation, and desire into undertaking.”
Nassim Taleb
If you’re someone who has zero ideas of what stoicism is… or if you want to revise all the most important pointers of stoicism, visit this post:
A to Z: Everything You Need to Know About Stoicism
Here are 4 lessons from stoic philosophers that help you lead an emotionally healthy life.
Choose Not to Be Harmed — and You Won’t Feel Harmed. Don’t Feel Harmed — and You Haven’t Been. (Marcus Aurelius)
Stoicism teaches us that we are in control of our mind.
We can choose not to be harmed.
Epictetus was a professor who was born as a slave. His leg was probably broken by his master.
But that didn’t stop him to start his own philosophy school.
In his own words, Epictetus said,
“Sickness is a hindrance to the body, but not to your ability to choose unless that is your choice. Lameness is a hindrance to the leg, but not to your ability to choose. Say this to yourself with regard to everything that happens, then you will see such obstacles as hindrances to something else, but not to yourself.”
epictetus
We Are More Often Frightened Than Hurt, and We Suffer More in Imagination Than in Reality. (Seneca)
Imagine you overslept on an important event day.
You are running late to the event. You must be having all the crazy thoughts in your mind, thinking ‘Oh, I’m dead now’.
And when you reach there, you see the event is running just fine, even without you.
Your presence wasn’t even that much necessary.
And hence goes the words of wisdom from Seneca- “…we suffer more in imagination than in reality.”
Did it really hurt you as much as you thought it would?
Probably not.
Contemptuous Expressions
Epictetus (stoic philosopher) used to do this activity with his students. (Source: The obstacle is the way by Ryan Holiday)
He would ask them, whenever they quote some great philosopher, to picture themselves standing next to that person having sex.
He would be grunting, moaning, and inappropriately awkward like any of us.
And that’s how you see the human nature of that person.
It’s an art of seeing things objectively. The old wine is fermented grapes, and the roasted meat is just a dead animal.
When you decide to see things what they are, you distance yourself from the world of delusions.
7 Ways Life Coaching Has Transformed My Life
It’s Not What Happens to You, but How You React to It That Matters. (Epictetus)
Nothing happens to any man which he is not formed by nature to bear. (Marcus Aurelius)
Here’s the timeline of Abraham Lincoln’s life (Source)
1816 His family was forced out of their home. He had to work to support them.
1818 His mother died.
1831 Failed in business.
1832 Ran for state legislature — lost.
l832 Also lost his job — wanted to go to law school but couldn’t get in.
1833 Borrowed some money from a friend to begin a business and by the end of the year, he was bankrupt.
He spent the next 17 years of his life paying off this debt.
1835 Was engaged to be married, sweetheart died and his heart was broken.
1836 Had a total nervous breakdown and was in bed for six months.
1838 Sought to become speaker of the state legislature — defeated.
1840 Sought to become elector — defeated.
1843 Ran for Congress — lost.
1848 Ran for re-election to Congress — lost.
1849 Sought the job of land officer in his home state — rejected.
1854 Ran for Senate of the United States — lost.
1856 Sought the Vice-Presidential nomination at his party’s national convention — gets less than 100 votes.
1858 Ran for U.S. Senate again — again he lost.
1860 Elected president of the United States.
Scroll up again and notice all the failures Lincoln had before becoming the elected president of the US.
You can react to a failure by either giving up or not giving up. There’s no other option, there never was, and there never will be.
Summary
Here are 4 lessons from stoic philosophers that help you lead an emotionally healthy life.
- Choose Not to Be Harmed — and You Won’t Feel Harmed. Don’t Feel Harmed — and You Haven’t Been. (Marcus Aurelius)
- We Are More Often Frightened Than Hurt, and We Suffer More in Imagination Than in Reality. (Seneca)
- Contemptuous Expressions. When you decide to see things what they are, you distance yourself from the world of delusions.
- It’s Not What Happens to You, but How You React to It That Matters. (Epictetus)
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